Today I attempted to get my cell phone in working order. It would make exploring the city SO much easier once my smartphone was up and running. The weather was still incredibly dusty, so we slept in and had a lazy morning at home before braving the dust to do this errand. Hunter informed me that the cell phone “guys” are in a traditionally orthodox neighborhood, so despite the 95 degree heat I got dressed in a long skirt, cardigan and scarf. As with every errand in a foreign country, it takes several attempts to get anything done at all. So, I’ll break my sequential narrative here and highlight my cell phone store experiences in this one post:

Trip #1 on 9/9: This store was a cultural experience to say the least. There was a pudgy young woman at the counter who said maybe three words in the 30 minutes we were in the 5’ x 5’ store. There was also a tall and pudgy man who was the “people person” and dealt with everyone that walked in the store. Even though there was a third employee, Mike, it was clear that Mike did not greet the customers or help them directly. Mike & the girl got their running orders from Tall Boss Man. This wouldn’t have been an problem but Tall Boss Man didn’t seem to know how to do anything himself, and the answer to every question was “um, Mike?” Even though it was my cell phone that we were discussing, Tall Boss Man only spoke to Hunter the entire time.

Trip #2 on 9/10: This time I went without Hunter. Tall Boss Man was forced to speak to me directly, and I gave him permission to unlock my AT&T SIM card so that, once that happened, I could come back and purchase and Israeli SIM card. It was the same song and dance, the girl was silent and picked at her nails, Tall Boss Man (TBM) assured me that unlocking a cell phone doesn’t take long, maybe two days at the absolute most. But, (with a sly little shrug which didn’t exactly show that he was sorry for the inconvenience) they would be closed the following two days, open for one day and then closed again for two days for the Rosh Hashanah holiday. TBM suggested I return after the holiday. Silent girl smiled and Mike stared at his phone.

Trip #3 on 9/16: Nearly one week later I return to the store, and the same cast of characters greets me. Unlike my previous trips, I am no longer the only customer in the store. There are also 3-4 elderly orthodox jewish men who shuffle aside when I enter and stare straight ahead. I hadn’t dressed in a long skirt today simply because I didn’t see the point of continuing to make myself uncomfortable, and I learned that although the store was quite close to the border of the orthodox jewish neighborhood, it was sort of in a “No Man’s Land,” so I took advantage of the lack of strict rule and wore shorts. TBM informs me that it shouldn’t take too much longer, but, you know, the holidays … Mike tells TBM who then tells me that in addition to the normal slow speed of these things, the AT&T man informed Mike that my phone was a particularly lengthy process. At this point I really just wanted it resolved, but clearly that wasn’t going to happen today. My best option was to buy an Israeli SIM card today, and then put it in my phone in the next few days. Mike, TBM and even silent girl assured me that it would be three days at the most.

Trip #4 on 9/20: Three days later I tried to fit the Israeli SIM card into my phone and it didn’t fit. The store was, not surprisingly, closed for Shabbat so I returned the next day.

This time, breaking through the fourth wall, Mike spoke to me directly. In perfect english! He had had an issue with the man at AT&T, and as a result it would take an extra three business days. The term “business days” was strictly American.

“So AT&T is honoring American business days AND Israeli holidays? That’s ridiculous” I asked, not too pleased.

“No, just American business days. It will work again in three days,” Mike said.

I didn’t trust Mike but I (still) had no other options. They cut down the SIM card to fit my phone, a move I have never seen before.

Three days later: I put the SIM card in the phone and miracles of miracles, it works. I can now explore the city with Siri by my side.